Devotion

Do you ever wonder where your devotion to your significant other came from? Did it spring up on you, out of the blue, like mine did?

I've been thinking about the past lately, and how I used to interact with Master. I'd been getting through a tough time, being the butt of two teenage guys' joke and a disastrous two meetings with a "dom", when he found his way into my life. His (now ex) sub was a friend of mine from a chatroom we frequented.

Being the quite, reserved, unsociable one I was (and still am to an extent), I started talking to him every night. At that point, we both were night owls and would sit and talk about things for 3 hours or more every night.

It didn't take me long at all to take a liking to him. He was a great listener, and liked to tease me, and I felt at ease (most of the time) when I was talking to him. When I say most of the time, I mean that I have this insecure/alternate side (doesn't everyone?) that tries to protect the kitten-y, subby one from what she deems "bad decisions." Master and I have deemed her Bitch.

Right off the bat, I felt a deeper connection, and it had me spooked. How the hell do you form such a deep connection with someone you've never met or seen a picture of? The feelings had me running scared for a while, but eventually life evened out.

My devotion stems from the way he's changed my life. I'm happy now. Not (only) because I belong somewhere unconditionally and unquestionably, but because the paths we've walked together have found a life I like. One that involves learning, working, and enjoying the hell out of (almost) everyday of my life. Sure, I still have my bad days. But who doesn't sometimes just want to laze about the house and do nothing for 24 hours?

I love my Master with everything I am, everything he's brought forth from the locked places inside, and everything we will discover in the future. He has earned every bit, and will have the gift of my submission for as long as he wishes.